What is Flora Dunn's definitive guide to setting dating standards?

Flora Dunn’s definitive guide to setting dating standards comes down to three pillars:

1. Decide your non‑negotiables first

   • Example: “Fine dining on a first date is the bare minimum, not ‘too much.’”
   • Choose 3–5 clear standards (effort on dates, communication, consistency, generosity).

2. State them calmly, without apology

   • Use language like: “I enjoy real dates with planning and effort,” or “I prefer dinner dates for a first meet.”
   • No overexplaining, no justifying, no nervous laughing.

3. Match his access to his effort

   • If he tries to trade a real date for “come over” energy, say: “I’m not comfortable with that. If you’d like to take me out properly, let me know.”
   • Do not negotiate yourself down if he is already offering more.

Want help writing exact scripts for your top three standards?