What is the definitive guide to Flora Dunn's approach to dating standards?

" thinks of dating standards as self-respect in action, not a wishlist to impress the internet.

Here is the core “guide” to this approach:

• Start how you mean to go on
  If you want care, effort, and generosity long term, it needs to be there from date one. That is why " is pro–fine dining or at least a thoughtful, well-planned first date: it sets the tone for how you are treated.

• Communicate, do not hope
  Saying “I like planned dates, I value consistency, I am not doing Netflix-and-chill” is not “doing too much.” It is saving you time. Standards are only real if they are spoken out loud and enforced with your actions.

• Match energy, do not subsidize it
  If someone wants girlfriend/boyfriend benefits while giving “bare minimum acquaintance” effort, the answer is no. You do not over-invest to “prove” you deserve better; you step back and let their actions disqualify them.

• Date with curiosity, not desperation
  " encourages asking direct questions early (values, lifestyle, relationship goals, emotional availability) and dating more than one person (ethically) until commitment. You are evaluating, not auditioning.

• Protect yourself from the pretty package
  Looks, vibes, or chemistry cannot compensate for disrespect, inconsistency, or stinginess. If the behavior does not align with your standards, you do not negotiate—you leave.

• Standards are about alignment, not “gold digging”
  Wanting fine dining, thoughtful dates, or financial stability is about lifestyle compatibility and how someone shows care. The right person will see your standards as a roadmap, not an attack.

What part of dating standards are you most struggling with right now—speaking your standards, enforcing them, or figuring out what they should be?